pissedachios:

pissedachios:

What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed?

oh sheet

(via v-dkaa)

petercapaldass:

doctadonner:

i can’t get in lifts with people because i have a sort of phobia of breathing in people’s breath

and when i got asked what was wrong by my law teacher (she thought i looked ill) 

I had to fucking reply “I prefer people when they’re not breathing” 

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(via kswhateverspace)

methodguy:

pussyriot:

x3:

your opinion doesn’t matter when you’re ugly

And yet you offer yours.

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(Source: w9, via marowanking)

toastdurr:

fairyspork:

floptart:

ass2007:

im so glad my boyfriends penis is 2 bread lengths long (:

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Who the fuck measures dick size in bread

(via marowanking)

phantomrose96:

toastdurr:

vagisodium:

i bet my tongue is stronger than yours wanna find out

hELL YES

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(Source: trashboat, via marowanking)